Hello and welcome to the Fairfax Cryobank Family Forum!
The forum has a new look and the Fairfax Team is so excited to create the best experience for our users.
To Note:
Private Donor Groups and Private Sibling Connection Groups are now located under the category "Groups". Search the donor number in the search box and you should find exactly what you're looking for!
Questions about your forum access? Email forum@fairfaxcryobank.com
Follow these steps to join a private donor group:
1) Press "Join" at the right of the group
2) Once prompted to confirm your request please list this information so we can verify your information:
Name (under which the vial was purchased)
Email
Clinic Name
Donor number
Child Date of Birth
*If you are looking to start a private group for a PRS donor please email forum@fairfaxcryobank.com with the above information and that you are looking for a PRS group*
If you have any questions about the verification process please email forum@fairfaxcryobank.com
The forum has a new look and the Fairfax Team is so excited to create the best experience for our users.
To Note:
Private Donor Groups and Private Sibling Connection Groups are now located under the category "Groups". Search the donor number in the search box and you should find exactly what you're looking for!
Questions about your forum access? Email forum@fairfaxcryobank.com
Follow these steps to join a private donor group:
1) Press "Join" at the right of the group
2) Once prompted to confirm your request please list this information so we can verify your information:
Name (under which the vial was purchased)
Clinic Name
Donor number
Child Date of Birth
*If you are looking to start a private group for a PRS donor please email forum@fairfaxcryobank.com with the above information and that you are looking for a PRS group*
If you have any questions about the verification process please email forum@fairfaxcryobank.com
Allison's story
I had decided a long time ago that I was going to be a mom. In this little book I filled out each school year, it asked, “What do you want to be when you grow up?” I had numerous things listed there throughout the years but the one constant was “a mom.” I remember being fascinated by pregnant women at a very young age and puffing out my belly to pretend I was pregnant! When I was in college, I decided that if I didn’t meet that “special someone” by the time I got to a certain age (I never really definitively defined that age), then I would figure out how to do it myself. I did tons of reading and talking and thinking and decided that donor insemination was the way I wanted to go. I was never and am still not opposed to adopting, but I really wanted to try to have a genetic connection to my child. I have 2 friends who have gone the donor insemination route, 1 anonymous and 1 known.
I finally made an appointment with the fertility clinic in September 2009. I was 36 at the time. I spent a month doing the fertility testing they suggested (not all, because I knew I did not have a fertility problem; my only problem was lack of free, fresh sperm). I had been charting my BBT and cervical fluid for close to a year at that point and had used a (borrowed) fertility monitor for a few months and everything seemed OK. I also started doing acupuncture that summer. I had blood tests done throughout my cycle that month and an ultrasound to check my ovarian reserve. (I refused anything having to do with Clomid!) Nothing revealed any evidence why I shouldn’t go forward. So I picked out my donor. It was really pretty easy to find. I picked an identity release donor who has similar characteristics as me (except I wanted a thin donor to give my child a genetic chance to maybe be thin). This one seemed to be perfect. I ordered 2 vials and was ready to go.
In October, my fertility monitor did not give me a peak reading, which had me puzzled and disappointed. In November, I had a peak reading and went in for my first IUI. Unfortunately it didn’t work that time. In December, I tried again and it worked! I was so excited and proud! I had turned 37 in November. I had an early ultrasound and they were concerned about the heart rate; it was too low. I refused any other ultrasounds beyond that because I just wanted to enjoy being pregnant, even if it wasn’t going to last. I miscarried Saturday February 20th, 2010; I was 10 weeks along. I was actually at a friend’s house 2 hours away. I woke up with bleeding, tried to will it away, which didn’t work so I drove the 2 hours home! Stupid maybe, but I knew I only wanted to be home if this was going to happen. My friend who I was visiting just had to put her cat down and she was an emotional wreck and her mother who was visiting was not a warm fuzzy sort of person. I really believe in signs and as I pulled into my driveway, a red tail hawk flew in front of me down the driveway. I was on the phone with a friend at the time (trying to stop myself from passing out) and I immediately started sobbing, but only because I knew it to be a good sign. Everything passed as it should, as soon as I was home and my body was supported.
I felt so sad and lonely after the miscarriage. I had this being that had been accompanying me everywhere for the last 2 months and now it was gone. I remember telling a friend that week how deeply sad I was. I had only felt sadness that deep when my mother died. On Easter weekend, I buried the fetal remains in the woods where I live. It was very difficult, more than I had thought. I had felt a definite connection to that baby and was amazed that I actually created something with a beating heart. I had been told before I got pregnant that my body knows when something is not quite right and miscarriage is its way of getting rid of something that is not viable. I tried to hold onto that.
My body (and mind) seemed to recover fairly well from the miscarriage. I started charting again and the fertility monitor told me I was ready again at the end of May. I had debated whether or not to go with the same donor but figured I was receptive to him the first time, might as well try with him again. I also tried searching for others but got frustrated because I couldn't find the "right one." I was also debating whether or not to start in May. I wasn’t sure my body was truly ready, but figured, “why not?” I ordered 2 vials. It didn’t work in May or June. I ordered 2 more vials. Neither of those worked either. Then the donor became unavailable. I was really sad at first, but I realized it was probably a good idea for me to switch anyway.
The good news is, I found a new donor and went on to conceive again the next cycle. It was tough to continue to stay positive and optimistic until I had my first appointment but I am currently 14 weeks pregnant and everything seems to be going well. I asked for permission to access this donor specific forum because of the connection I feel to that baby of my first pregnancy. I am thankful though for my experiences of the past and excited for my adventures of the future!
I finally made an appointment with the fertility clinic in September 2009. I was 36 at the time. I spent a month doing the fertility testing they suggested (not all, because I knew I did not have a fertility problem; my only problem was lack of free, fresh sperm). I had been charting my BBT and cervical fluid for close to a year at that point and had used a (borrowed) fertility monitor for a few months and everything seemed OK. I also started doing acupuncture that summer. I had blood tests done throughout my cycle that month and an ultrasound to check my ovarian reserve. (I refused anything having to do with Clomid!) Nothing revealed any evidence why I shouldn’t go forward. So I picked out my donor. It was really pretty easy to find. I picked an identity release donor who has similar characteristics as me (except I wanted a thin donor to give my child a genetic chance to maybe be thin). This one seemed to be perfect. I ordered 2 vials and was ready to go.
In October, my fertility monitor did not give me a peak reading, which had me puzzled and disappointed. In November, I had a peak reading and went in for my first IUI. Unfortunately it didn’t work that time. In December, I tried again and it worked! I was so excited and proud! I had turned 37 in November. I had an early ultrasound and they were concerned about the heart rate; it was too low. I refused any other ultrasounds beyond that because I just wanted to enjoy being pregnant, even if it wasn’t going to last. I miscarried Saturday February 20th, 2010; I was 10 weeks along. I was actually at a friend’s house 2 hours away. I woke up with bleeding, tried to will it away, which didn’t work so I drove the 2 hours home! Stupid maybe, but I knew I only wanted to be home if this was going to happen. My friend who I was visiting just had to put her cat down and she was an emotional wreck and her mother who was visiting was not a warm fuzzy sort of person. I really believe in signs and as I pulled into my driveway, a red tail hawk flew in front of me down the driveway. I was on the phone with a friend at the time (trying to stop myself from passing out) and I immediately started sobbing, but only because I knew it to be a good sign. Everything passed as it should, as soon as I was home and my body was supported.
I felt so sad and lonely after the miscarriage. I had this being that had been accompanying me everywhere for the last 2 months and now it was gone. I remember telling a friend that week how deeply sad I was. I had only felt sadness that deep when my mother died. On Easter weekend, I buried the fetal remains in the woods where I live. It was very difficult, more than I had thought. I had felt a definite connection to that baby and was amazed that I actually created something with a beating heart. I had been told before I got pregnant that my body knows when something is not quite right and miscarriage is its way of getting rid of something that is not viable. I tried to hold onto that.
My body (and mind) seemed to recover fairly well from the miscarriage. I started charting again and the fertility monitor told me I was ready again at the end of May. I had debated whether or not to go with the same donor but figured I was receptive to him the first time, might as well try with him again. I also tried searching for others but got frustrated because I couldn't find the "right one." I was also debating whether or not to start in May. I wasn’t sure my body was truly ready, but figured, “why not?” I ordered 2 vials. It didn’t work in May or June. I ordered 2 more vials. Neither of those worked either. Then the donor became unavailable. I was really sad at first, but I realized it was probably a good idea for me to switch anyway.
The good news is, I found a new donor and went on to conceive again the next cycle. It was tough to continue to stay positive and optimistic until I had my first appointment but I am currently 14 weeks pregnant and everything seems to be going well. I asked for permission to access this donor specific forum because of the connection I feel to that baby of my first pregnancy. I am thankful though for my experiences of the past and excited for my adventures of the future!