Hello and welcome to the Fairfax Cryobank Family Forum!
The forum has a new look and the Fairfax Team is so excited to create the best experience for our users.
To Note:
Private Donor Groups and Private Sibling Connection Groups are now located under the category "Groups". Search the donor number in the search box and you should find exactly what you're looking for!
Questions about your forum access? Email forum@fairfaxcryobank.com
Follow these steps to join a private donor group:
1) Press "Join" at the right of the group
2) Once prompted to confirm your request please list this information so we can verify your information:
Name (under which the vial was purchased)
Email
Clinic Name
Donor number
Child Date of Birth
*If you are looking to start a private group for a PRS donor please email forum@fairfaxcryobank.com with the above information and that you are looking for a PRS group*
If you have any questions about the verification process please email forum@fairfaxcryobank.com
The forum has a new look and the Fairfax Team is so excited to create the best experience for our users.
To Note:
Private Donor Groups and Private Sibling Connection Groups are now located under the category "Groups". Search the donor number in the search box and you should find exactly what you're looking for!
Questions about your forum access? Email forum@fairfaxcryobank.com
Follow these steps to join a private donor group:
1) Press "Join" at the right of the group
2) Once prompted to confirm your request please list this information so we can verify your information:
Name (under which the vial was purchased)
Clinic Name
Donor number
Child Date of Birth
*If you are looking to start a private group for a PRS donor please email forum@fairfaxcryobank.com with the above information and that you are looking for a PRS group*
If you have any questions about the verification process please email forum@fairfaxcryobank.com
IVF
I've read a lot of things on here about people doing IUI. I'm surprised at how many people are having great success with this. My partner and I have tried IUI approximately 10 times over a period of 3 years and have never had a pregnancy.
We have tried a couple different donors and have had MANY tests done. All of the tests have come back "normal," but still no pregnancy. We will be doing IVF starting July 1st. This is very stressful. We're already easily $10k in to IUI including the sperm, and are now forking over $13k for IVF.
Any other same sex couples who have had similar experience? I'm surprised with the lengthy process this has been. My partner is carrying the child and all of her siblings have multiple children, many of them who were "unplanned." We never thought it would be this difficult.
We have tried a couple different donors and have had MANY tests done. All of the tests have come back "normal," but still no pregnancy. We will be doing IVF starting July 1st. This is very stressful. We're already easily $10k in to IUI including the sperm, and are now forking over $13k for IVF.
Any other same sex couples who have had similar experience? I'm surprised with the lengthy process this has been. My partner is carrying the child and all of her siblings have multiple children, many of them who were "unplanned." We never thought it would be this difficult.
Comments
The 1st place was putting me on progesterone gel because mine was low. Found out later that this treatment may actually PREVENT pregnancy. What did we know?
So, $15,000, 3 donors, and 2 facilities later- we've got our boys. Keep trying and it will happen for you. Best wishes!
Danielle
We just finished our IVF cycle and the pregnancy test was a BFP!! My partner is 4 weeks, 4 days preggers. We have been praying so much that this pregnancy will be healthy, and that we have a healthy baby.
We decided not to do the attain, because of the obvious costs. If this cycle ends up being successful, then it was a good choice and if not, then who knows.
Thanks for the happy thoughts!! We did not have any to freeze. We had 7 eggs at the retrieval, 5 that fertilized and the 2 best were transferred on day 5. The others were monitored until day 6, but they did collapse. At first that was disappointing, but we believe God will have this cycle work--so we won't need any frozen.
The only reason we were able to pay for it, is because we took out extra student loans. Of course it's worrisome to have "extra" debt, but to have a baby it's worth it. Also, you never know what the insurance coverage will be. Our insurance coverage is usually excellent. However, they told us that they will pay NOTHING for invitro--nothing for meds, monitoring, retrieval, transfer. But when it came down to it they covered almost all of the medications and all of the ultrasounds. The only meds we're paying out of pocket is now-for the progesterone. Granted it's very expensive, but they did cover all of the injectables. We're owing co-pays for each of the US visits, but the US themselves are covered. So far it's cost us about $7800 out of pocket and this progesterone is about $300/month. At this point, it's uncertain how long my partner will stay on that, the doctor will tell us at the first prenatal US.
We have a similar story to yours; three years of trying...10 IUIs, uterine surgery, and one miscarriage ... We were only days from starting an IVF when I was laid off, and so we decided not to pay $$$ for IVF and instead just pay $$ for IUI. And it actually worked.
Your baby and my baby are probably due around the same time (mid-Jan 2012). Keep us posted on your progress, and good luck with everything!
My wife is almost 36 and was regularly producing 6-8 follicles per month -- and they said THAT was high. So 20+ follicles is an awful lot, with or without fertility meds. If you had 20 follicles, I'm REALLY surprised your clinic even moved ahead on the insems. It's difficult for any one of those follicles to trigger an egg release when it's battling with 20 others to mature. I wonder if, even if you did an IUI and it worked, whether the swimmers would end up with an egg that's a dud (or in more technical terms, chromosomally deficient). To say nothing of the chance of multiples.
Even though you've only done 3 tries at your current clinic, I assume they know about the 9 with your regular doc...and 12 IUIs with no reported pregnancy would raise eyebrows with any doctor. Our insurance helped cover part of IUIs but $0 on the IVF procedure itself, so I totally get the financial piece. IVF is a bigger deal in every way. The chance of having a healthy baby is 3x greater with IVF...but the impact on your financial, emotional, and physical well-being is 10x greater than it was with IUIs.
That said, at 38 you need to get down to business. I'm sure you've seen this chart or one like it: http://novaivf.com/images/ivf-od-by-age.gif
Time is ticking, friend, and you have done your due diligence on IUIs. My heart goes out to you. Keep us posted on next steps.
I'll leave you with an interesting article from 2007: http://www.slate.com/id/2178377/
"The reduced time it takes to get pregnant on the IVF fast track is a significant advantage. What do three months matter? A lot for older women with few fertile years left. In fact, time is so critical to these would-be mothers that the researchers are conducting a second trial looking at recommending IVF right away, without any Clomid first, for women between the ages of 38 and 43. Shorter waits bring welcome psychological relief. One study claimed that women going through infertility treatment were as distressed as women diagnosed with cancer, heart disease, or HIV. Fast-tracking can mean fewer episodes of dashed hopes. That could lead to less depression, anxiety, and stress, which hurts marriages and, some claim, may lower one's chances of conceiving."
Congrats on your pregnancy. You're actually a ways ahead of us I would say, because our due date isn't until 4/4/12. We just had our first ultrasound today, and we found out that it's TWINS!!! We saw BOTH heart beats...so cool!
So now it's just a lot of praying that they're both healthy. Our doctor said they will probably be born more like the beginning of March since twins average gestation is 36 weeks. We cannot wait!
My follicles were in excess according to my specialists...she did say that I'm borderline too many...which she found shocking for my age. When it came down to insemination day(s) - there were only 2-4 of decent size so I think that's why there wasn't any stopping of the insems. I didn't push that subject so when I meet with her again...I will definitely talk about that some more and specifically when doing IVF. I was wondering if you (or anyone else reading) have any insight to the tax break or write off for medical bills. I was reading on a blog for someone that doing something as spendy as IVF or adding up all other expenses out of pocket minus a certain % of your annual salary - can be done. Has anyone done that? I'm wondering if there are any loop holes to that...it definitely would help!
TandM - congrats on the Twins...how exciting!!! Please give updates or better yet...do you blog? I am addicted to blog reading
My spouse didn't itemize her taxes last year, so we weren't able to consider this deduction but it is definitely something to keep on the radar!
This IRS page lists some helpful detail: http://www.irs.gov/publications/p502/ar02.html
* "Fertility Enhancement" is a deductible medical expense
* Cost of procedure must have exceeded 7.5% of your adjusted gross income (AGI).
I'd consult a tax professional on what's included as a deductible expense. But definitely something worth looking into!
You are not alone. We did 8 unsuccessful IUIs (3 without medication, 5 with clomid, switched donors twice) before finally conceiving on our second IVF attempt in February 2010. (Well, second, but using frozen embryos from the first.) It was such a stressful and frustrating experience, my wife and I were fighting like crazy -- trying not to blame each other, walking on egg shells, going out of our minds -- but our son (now 17 months old) is just perfect. Which is not to say that my wife would do it again: when we started talking about trying for baby #2, she laid it out flat -- "I'm done; it's your turn."