Hello and welcome to the Fairfax Cryobank Family Forum!
The forum has a new look and the Fairfax Team is so excited to create the best experience for our users.
To Note:
Private Donor Groups and Private Sibling Connection Groups are now located under the category "Groups". Search the donor number in the search box and you should find exactly what you're looking for!
Questions about your forum access? Email forum@fairfaxcryobank.com
Follow these steps to join a private donor group:
1) Press "Join" at the right of the group
2) Once prompted to confirm your request please list this information so we can verify your information:
Name (under which the vial was purchased)
Email
Clinic Name
Donor number
Child Date of Birth
*If you are looking to start a private group for a PRS donor please email forum@fairfaxcryobank.com with the above information and that you are looking for a PRS group*
If you have any questions about the verification process please email forum@fairfaxcryobank.com
The forum has a new look and the Fairfax Team is so excited to create the best experience for our users.
To Note:
Private Donor Groups and Private Sibling Connection Groups are now located under the category "Groups". Search the donor number in the search box and you should find exactly what you're looking for!
Questions about your forum access? Email forum@fairfaxcryobank.com
Follow these steps to join a private donor group:
1) Press "Join" at the right of the group
2) Once prompted to confirm your request please list this information so we can verify your information:
Name (under which the vial was purchased)
Clinic Name
Donor number
Child Date of Birth
*If you are looking to start a private group for a PRS donor please email forum@fairfaxcryobank.com with the above information and that you are looking for a PRS group*
If you have any questions about the verification process please email forum@fairfaxcryobank.com
Our Story..
jenniferuc23
Junior Member Junior Member
My partner and I have been together 16 years and just had our first child, a daughter, July 28th. My partner is 38 years old and carried for us. We purchased our sperm from Fairfax. We went through nine attempts with our first donor, then switched to another and were successful the first try. We did IUI as she was responding quite well to the Clomid, was in great shape, and other than her age, had no reason to jump to Invitro.
Our insurance covered the office visits (e.g., consults, ultrasounds, blood work) and part of the medication expense but not the actual IUI procedure. It was also tricky with the blood work; initially we were going to be charged over $1,500 each for this to be done but once her diagnosis changed to Infertility they picked up the expense. Most states make it mandatory to perform such blood work prior to infertility/fertility treatments. Do not assume this will be paid for - it is incredibly expensive if it is not.
The actual process was quite time consuming, especially for us due to the distance involved. It was an hour and a half round trip and we found ourselves traveling for treatments about 5-6 times per month. Make sure you keep track of mileage and all out of pocket expenses (e.g., copays, IUI procedure payments) as they can all be deductible medical expenses. The IRS will tell you what the mileage rate is on their website.
After about seven months of unsuccessful attempts we decided to take a break. She had gone through a laparoscopy to see if she had any indicators of infertility (endometriosis, adhesions) and they found next to nothing that should be preventing her from getting pregnant. She was also responding quite well to the Clomid, producing at least 2-3 mature follicles each attempt. We decided to try acupuncture. She did this twice a week for two months (this is is also a deductible expense). Our insurance company didn't cover the entire cost of this but took care of some of it. Make sure to check with your provider.
After completing the acupuncture we decided to try again with the original donor and were unsuccessful. We then decided to start fresh with a new donor and got pregnant on the first try! She had a wonderful pregnancy and we now have a healthy little girl. State of mind is so important - stay positive, keep your body in good condition, eat right and you may just be as lucky as us!
We are now in the process of filing an intent to adopt. Since I am not the birth parent I need to go through the adoption process to ensure my rights as a parent going forward. This will allow us to add my name to the birth certificate as well. When we had our daughter we ensured her last name included both of ours (hyphenated). You can name your baby pretty much anything you want which is important to know beforehand. After the adoption is complete we will then change our last names to match that our of child.
Please let me know if you have any questions. We intend to try again in the upcoming months but with me as the carrier (with the same donor).
Good luck!
Our insurance covered the office visits (e.g., consults, ultrasounds, blood work) and part of the medication expense but not the actual IUI procedure. It was also tricky with the blood work; initially we were going to be charged over $1,500 each for this to be done but once her diagnosis changed to Infertility they picked up the expense. Most states make it mandatory to perform such blood work prior to infertility/fertility treatments. Do not assume this will be paid for - it is incredibly expensive if it is not.
The actual process was quite time consuming, especially for us due to the distance involved. It was an hour and a half round trip and we found ourselves traveling for treatments about 5-6 times per month. Make sure you keep track of mileage and all out of pocket expenses (e.g., copays, IUI procedure payments) as they can all be deductible medical expenses. The IRS will tell you what the mileage rate is on their website.
After about seven months of unsuccessful attempts we decided to take a break. She had gone through a laparoscopy to see if she had any indicators of infertility (endometriosis, adhesions) and they found next to nothing that should be preventing her from getting pregnant. She was also responding quite well to the Clomid, producing at least 2-3 mature follicles each attempt. We decided to try acupuncture. She did this twice a week for two months (this is is also a deductible expense). Our insurance company didn't cover the entire cost of this but took care of some of it. Make sure to check with your provider.
After completing the acupuncture we decided to try again with the original donor and were unsuccessful. We then decided to start fresh with a new donor and got pregnant on the first try! She had a wonderful pregnancy and we now have a healthy little girl. State of mind is so important - stay positive, keep your body in good condition, eat right and you may just be as lucky as us!
We are now in the process of filing an intent to adopt. Since I am not the birth parent I need to go through the adoption process to ensure my rights as a parent going forward. This will allow us to add my name to the birth certificate as well. When we had our daughter we ensured her last name included both of ours (hyphenated). You can name your baby pretty much anything you want which is important to know beforehand. After the adoption is complete we will then change our last names to match that our of child.
Please let me know if you have any questions. We intend to try again in the upcoming months but with me as the carrier (with the same donor).
Good luck!
Comments
So what made you finally decide to try another donor? We purchased 8 vials of our first pick although if we get pregnant, we would like to have some extra tucked away so that we can try again in another couple years.
And if you don't mind me asking - what state are you in? And how will the process work with the "Intent to Adopt"? I will be the birth parent but my partner will be the stay at home mom. We definitely want to make sure that we are both covered legally when it comes to our child. Our doctor suggested a local lawyer that we should talk to. We saw her once and she told us to come back once we were pregnant and that she would go through our options then. We're from Kentucky and unfortunately it's not very progressive here so not sure what our options will really be.
We are in Pennsylvania, which has little precedent for same sex adoptions. Though there is no law that states I can't adopt there isn't one that says I can either. We are the first couple in our area to do this so it sounds like we are in a similar situation. Our attorney has never done one but was willing to take it on to improve his skill set regarding the issue. He is going about it the same was as one would a step-parent adoption. It should be complete by mid November at the very latest.
Adoption is very important. Even friends who are legally married in Connecticut have gone through the step of adoption due to the lack of recognition in other states. Though they are safe at home, it isn't the case in most other areas in the US.
Once you are pregnant you can begin some of the initial paperwork which is a good idea b/c the process can take a few months.
Please let me know if I can help in the future.
We are in Texas and have 3 beautiful boys from the same donor. Our first son was absolutely no problem. Our doctor put me on Clomid and the first insemination worked. We always knew we wanted 2 children, so when our son was 9 months old we tried insemination again. This time it wasn't so easy. It took 4 months. Finally the 4th insemination was successful...TOO successful...Twin boys!
We also went through a second parent adoption for all 3 boys so that my partner is also considered their mother, however, we could not put her name on the birth certificate (which kinda bummed us out). We paid the lawyer $1500 for her portion and another $500 for the home study.
I really wanted a girl and would love to try again but my partner doesn't want to chance having triplet boys next!!
Hi,
I used donor sperm from Fairfax, and had an IUI at the givf institute. I'm from the UK so did all the bloodwork in the UK. Had an over the phone consultation and then flew into the area a few days before I was due to ovulate. I used Ovulation Predictor Kits and as soon as it turned positive I went down to the GIVF institute and they performed an IUI. 9 Months later I gave birth to a beautiful baby boy.
My partner (who is American but plays professional womens basketball in Europe) was able to accompany me the entire time.
We have just started the entire process all over again and I am just waiting to find out if I'm pregnant or not - fingers crossed!!!
It's lovely to hear everyones story and I wish everyone the best with their future attempts. I will keep you al updated with my news
:P
I would love to hear how many of you chose ID options vs regular donor?? and why? Also, if anyone had used donor 2750?
I wanted to put it out there for all of you going through a costly adoption and home study. The process is a tax credit (not a deductable) meaning you will get 100% of your money credited back to you. So don't forget that we, as same sex couples, can sometimes beat the system. we spent aprox $3000 and got every penny back so keep track of all of your spendings!!!!
Good luck to all of you out there and stay positive....it took up 14 attempts to get pregnant with our now 4 yr old and only 4 tries with our 2 yr old.
We are also in the process of my partner adopting our daughter thru the Baltimore City court system. We have a very reputable lawyer to represent us but it was quite expensive. The wills and adoption has cost us somewhere around $4500 USD.
Good luck to you.
Sara, if you live in Miss. I assume your "marriage" isn't legal correct? Though me and my partner have been together for 17 years and had a ceremony in Maine seven years ago, we are not legally bound. Therefore, we had to go to court for me (the non-carrier) to adopt our daughter that my partner had carried and delivered. First thing we had to check on is PA law regarding same sex adoption. It is not illegal in PA but I believe it is illegal in Mississippi. I had to adopt her before I could get my name on the birth certificate. She received an initial certificate that had only my partner's name on it. After the adoption we then applied for a new certificate with the corrected information showing us both as parents. Though we started the adoption process well before her birth (as much as possible without having an actual baby), it took us well over a year for the adoption to be finalized and the new birth certificate to be distributed.
If you do not live there but live in a state where same sex couples can adopt, then you may have to go through a home study. Our attny. fought this and we were able to bypass this step. In many "second-parent" adoptions a home study is required - straight or gay and in some instances there is very little precedent for same sex - second parent adoption therefore the attorneys/judges simply make the home study a requirement to "keep things simple." This can be quite expensive and it saved us $1-$2,000 and an extension in our adoption process. Once we had that ruling the adoption went through quite efficiently and before we knew it I was her legal parent. We simply took the paperwork to the clerk to be filed and they gave us the information necessary to apply for the "corrected" birth certificate.
I hope this information is helpful to you - I may have gone into more detail than you wanted but it is good to know some of the back ground information.
If you have any other questions, I would be happy to try to assist. Jennifer
Thank you,
L
Janet, I was able to find this information re: NJ second parent adoptions - http://www.gustonlaw.com/Practice-Areas ... tion.shtml Scroll down to second parent adoptions - this is my assumption you or your partner will be having the child and the other is interested in adopting. If it is another type of adoption just check out one of the other adoption descriptions. I thought this site was very informational and, while it seems a home study may be part of your future - it is not a guarantee. From reading through the article it seems this requirement is loosening.
If I were you I would find an attny who is willing to fight the home study requirement or at least take a hard look at it. Seems you are quite lucky to live in NJ as it is even more gay friendly than PA is and we didn't need a home study.
Good luck!
Jennifer