Our Story..

jenniferuc23

2KYMoms

jenniferuc23

ti5491

Hi , we are in ct and just went thru a second parent adoption. It was easy but quite costly....We have twins a boy and a girl....the whole process took about 8 months and was pretty smooth....We hired a lawyer which you really don't need to in Ct...the lawyer was about $1500.00 and then we also needed a home study that was really quite expensive and time consuming all in all the process was very smooth...total cost approx $4500.00

NYCMom

Congratulations on your baby! Our daughter was conceived via unmedicated IUI, we were lucky it worked the 2nd try. She was born April 30th, 2009. I carried her and my partner 2nd parent adopted her, it took over a year from her birth in our case (and we started the paperwork before she was born) but that was because our lawyers weren't motivated to move faster, despite the fact they specialize in this type of work. But it's done We are in NYC so it's super common here to 2nd parent adopt. It cost us $2k all together including drawing up our wills, medical proxies and doing a name change for me and the home visit was free because the state performed it.

roadrunner071977

Becky1

zahava1980

Elliotts03

My partner and I looked through all the donors, and finally found one that matched well to her personality traits. It only took two tries with IUI and I got pregnant. Our son was born in March of this year. We plan on having another baby down the line, this time with her carrying the baby and hopefully it's another smooth process. Unfortunately we live in a state that doesnt allow second parent adoption so we are going off our own word. Definetly not the best way to go but until the law catches up, its the best we can do other than our wills and medical release. I am beyond happy with the whole insemination experience. It was easier than expected, we were very lucky in that aspect. It's good to see other same sex parents with children. I hope to see more as our son gets older.

traciedietz

pandt

We are in NC and expecting in April. We have tried to do as much as we could to make our family as "normal" as it's going to be...including legally changing my partner's name to my last name so that when the baby is born, we will all share the same last name, and it can go on my insurance which is better than hers. The problem here is that in order for a child to be adopted, the state has said that birth parents must "sever the ties" and legally that is how it goes. However, a state Senator here-Julia Boseman and her partner Melissa Jarrell are now locked in a heated child custody battle because Jarell did a "modified" adoption in a very liberal county which allowed her to retain her parental rights while adding Boseman's as well-which wasn't prohibited, but wasn't allowed either-the district court judges signed off because the both of them wanted it at the time. Of course they split up and Boseman filed for joint custody based on the adoption. The case was heard in the NC Court of Appeals, and the Court of Appeals let the joint adoption stand and there was an immediate appeal by Jarell who, ironically, now says gay people can't adopt because it's not legal???? What??? As of now, all same sex-and for that matter all adoptions may be changed by this pending court case which is scheduled for NC Supreme Court hearings soon. So, given this mess, we cannot go forward with adoption until we know if it will be allowed here or not. At that point, if it's a no go, then I would certainly be at the mercy and graciousness of my partner regarding custody issues.

lpriddy

jenniferuc23

SaraBell

Does anyone know how a same sex marriage affects the birth certificate? Does the non-carrier automatically go on the birth certificate?

jenniferuc23

Janet

Jennifer, thank you for your information. It's crazy that it takes a whole year for the process to go through!!! Yikes. I wonder if they will require a home visit in NJ... Any NJ folks out there know the process?

Lindabooka

jenniferuc23

SaraBell

We were legally married in Connecticut, but of course you are correct in saying that it is not adknowledged in Mississippi. Can I just leave the state to give birth? Mostly from what I have read, it looks like if I give birth in a state that recognizes or allows same sex marriage, she would go on the birth certificate. (just like heterosexual married couples that use cryobanks or donors for infertility) BUT do we actually have to be residents? This is such a pain in the rear! I think our best option is to contact Lambda Legal for options.