Large Donor Sibling Groups

2181mom

We have a large donor sibling group - 35 kids that we know of. We've been fortunate to connect with each other online and have established an annual gathering so the kids can know each other. While it is something I've grown to appreciate, it is also something I wasn't prepared for. There is definitely benefit for my kids to know their donor siblings. Research indicates that this is important. However, it's hard knowing how the sheer numbers of siblings will effect my kids. There are definitely parenting implications when other families' decisions and lives intersect with your own in this unusual way.

newmom13

Wow..I hear your concerns. I agree...35 is daunting. I might want to leave that decision up to my child. Does anyone know if Fairfax places a cap on the # of pregnancies or kids a single donor is allowed?

Thanks.

michele3b

Found 2 other families with donor siblings to my 3 sons.
Not sure when I should tell my boys, and was wondering what the benefits of introducing them to donor siblings would be.

sarahpchri

Hi -
Just wondering where you found the information? I don't know what I would do with it, but am curious. We have a few allergy issues that I'd like to see if others have as well.

I think disclosing depends on your specific situation and that there are pros and cons to both sides. As my boys get older and my husband is more involved, the less I think how they were concieved is important.

Thanks!

[Deleted User]

Hello all!

I wanted to respond and direct you to the Limitation of Donor Births section on the website: http://www.fairfaxcryobank.com/ReadFirs ... itsOnBirth. This section will answer you question.

It is important for our patients to report their pregnancies/births. Because not all patients do report, we track the production and distribution numbers to stay within the limit of 25-30 family units.

Thank you for using Fairfax!
Michelle Ottey

slh7735

How did you find all of the siblings? I am just starting my search for my son's siblings and I would loe some direction from anyone who can help. Thankyou soo much!

Jesy's Mommy

Wow... I'm sure it may be futile to say, but I hope it never reaches that number for the donor I used. I just had my baby girl 3 weeks ago and shortly before that I realized a pregnancy was reported as I was reporting mine. I hope that if that family/ or single woman's (as I am) pregnancy goes all the way that they make themselves known some kind of way. Whether on here or DSR so we might make some kind of contact. If my child has a sibling out there it'd be great for her to grow up at least knowing something about them. Maybe even share pictures of the children. My daughter is young yet, but she appears to have the donors nose and eyes. Maybe both children won't feel so alone about their origins once things are undsertood if they are. I plan to be open to my daughter about her origins (I don't want her to feel lied too, be missinformed or missunderstand what a true blessing she is), but I'd never force that on another parent of a child concieved by use of the same donor or tell my daughter someone is her half-sibling without discussing that with the other parent(s) first. I'd just like her to have the chance to know them.

Two2148Sons

You can check www.donorsiblinggroups.com (free site) to see if there's a donor group established and listed for your donor. We have 56 known half siblings in our donor group and we know there are many more kids from our donor out there simply based on the fact that such a small percentage of donor families "come out". We don't need DNA tests in our donor group to see the AMAZING physical similarities among the children!

redolfin26

i think the benefit of connecting with siblings regardless of the number there are is important...i put myself in my daughters situation...what would she want..do i want to find herself as an adult and finding out she has siblings and having gone through her childhood not knowing them and have to play catch up 30 years or do we make the connection now while she is still young and give her a lifetime of connection...we chose the latter...we made a beautiful connection on the donorsiblingregistry.com a few months back and will meet our daughters brother next weekend, mothers day weekend, for being mothers is what brought us togther,,,we have been sharing emails, pictures, facebook, packages and videos so that even though we are not close in miles, we are close in spirit until the next visit which is in june...we feel blessed to have made such a wonderful connectin with a darling boy and his amazing mom...they are family...we hope there is more to come and can connect with other siblings going forward...