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Hello and welcome to the Fairfax Cryobank Family Forum!
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Starting MY Family!!!

KittyKatt84KittyKatt84 Junior Member
in Single Mothers
Hello everyone!!!
I am 27 years old and i recently went through surgery to have three areas of my cervix removed due to cancer. After much consideration and speaking with my docter, i have decided to start my own family. I am not dating so ofcourse there are no prospects on the horizen( LOL) for me to include in this venture.
I am very happy with my decision and i have a wonferful family who supports my choice. I have no doubt that I will make a wonderful mother and i would hate to sit around and wait for THE ONE and miss my chance to have a beautiful child.
Is there any advice or books out there that i can ready that will ease my mind and heart a little bit more about this decision. Any and all feedback is welcome and appreciated!!
thank you!!!! :P
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Comments

  • robinrobin Senior Member Senior Member
    Kittykat,
    Instead of listing all the books suggested, I thought I would just bring forward the older post on books! I left a message for you there! :D
    Robin
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  • AmirasmommyAmirasmommy Senior Member Senior Member
    You can get almost all of the info and support you need through forums. I'm on a great one. [url="Http://forums.fertilitycommunity.com/singles-trying-conceive/"]Http://forums.fertilitycommunity.com/si ... -conceive/[/url] specifically for single women. This site has other forums related to IUI. http://forums.fertilitycommunity.com/in ... ation-iui/ good luck!!!
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  • smilingeyessmilingeyes Junior Member Junior Member
    It can be a tough decision to be a single mom and let go of the fantasy of how things "should" be. I started my journey at 35 contemplating it since I hadn't met Mr. Right, and started the actual process at 38. Good for you for jumping in! It takes a lot of courage!

    Exactly 6 months ago today I gave birth to my beautiful daughter using donor sperm! I went through 7 IUI's (4 rounds with clomid) and 4 IVF's and finally got pregnant at age 39! My mom and I kept praying and repeating the verse from the Bible (Matthew 19:26)... "with God all things are possible". I put that saying on her birth announcement. My daughters middle name is Faith, because you need alot of it and develop so much of it on this journey. Wishing you peace and your hearts desire. It's an amazing journey! Cher
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  • smilingeyessmilingeyes Junior Member Junior Member
    Oh and by the way I read a few books... "Single by Chance, mothers by choice" and some other similar books. Just google them. Also, there is a group called SMC (Single Mother's by Choice) that you can join, go to meetings and converse with others in the same boat. Hope it helps! Best wishes! Cher
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  • dreamsabc123dreamsabc123 Senior Member Senior Member
    I'm just starting this process of planning to be a single mom because I haven't found Mr. Right. By the time I have enough financial resources to go ahead with this process I will be 31. I was wondering if I could hear from other single women with no infertility concerns, how many rounds of IUI with donor sperm did it take? Thanks!
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  • robinrobin Senior Member Senior Member
    dreams,
    the average attempt is between 4-6 times before getting that bfp (big fat positive! on the pregnancy test). the first step is to find an re (reproductive endrocronologist, someone who specializes in this) Although you have no known fertility issues, I suggest going this route because they are experts in their feild. They will usually perform an hsg to make sure that there is no blockages in your fallopian tubes. A blockage could happen for a variety of issues. I suggest this just to make sure there are no issues. It would suck to have a few attempts and then find out that there was a blockage. The doc will probably take bloodwork as well just to get a baseline. Then you decide whether you want to go au natural with no meds and using a opk test kit at home, or whether to use meds. Even those with no fertility issues sometimes choose to use meds for timing purposes. This is your own decision, with what works best for you. You pick a donor, I recommend paying the 150 for the unlimited access, to get all the baby pictures and other things. I have found that it is worth the $. Any other questions, just ask. We are here to help!

    Good luck on your journey!

    Robin
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  • dreamsabc123dreamsabc123 Senior Member Senior Member
    Robin,
    That post was very helpful to me. Do I actually get a choice to use meds or not? It sounded like they would want me to not use meds, but I would rather use meds just to increase my chances of conception. My insurance will not cover IUI for me, so how expensive could this be? I know it's different for everyone, but I would like to hear from peoples experiences so I know how much to save. Thanks!!!!
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  • robinrobin Senior Member Senior Member
    Dreams,
    It depends on the RE on whether they will let you use meds right away. My doc gave me the choice, and I chose to use meds. Some other docs want you to start naturally. Discuss this withyour doc and advocate for what you want!

    Robin
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  • dreamsabc123dreamsabc123 Senior Member Senior Member
    Great and will do! One last question, what is RE? I've seen it on here a few times now.
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  • robinrobin Senior Member Senior Member
    Dreams,
    An re is a reproductive endrocronologist. A doc that specializes in fertility issues as well as endrometriosis and things like that. I really wish I had gone to an re last year when I had my surgery! I bet I would have at least a part of my left ovary but everything happens for a reson and bc of that surgery I am now on the path I am on!
    Robin
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  • AmirasmommyAmirasmommy Senior Member Senior Member
    RE is a fertility specialist. They are not essential but I recommend seeing one to help establish a plan of action. I'd say a cycle with DS (donor sperm) will run anywhere from $500-$2000 per cycle or more if you end up moving to injectibles if you have any fertility issues. I didn't think I had any fertility issues. I've been pregnant twice and have had 1 full term birth but it turns out I have PCOS. So what I thought would take one cycle is turning out to be much more complicated. You don't need to save for many rounds...just save for one and start. Then if that cycle doesn't work you can save for the next. That's what I'm doing. I have a separate savings account set up and have $ direct deposited into that account from each pay check. So this helps and it adds up quick. Good luck and feel free to ask questions. Also I recommend checking out This forum http://forums.fertilitycommunity.com/si ... -conceive/ for more info and support.
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  • dreamsabc123dreamsabc123 Senior Member Senior Member
    Thanks, that was very helpful. I did find an RE, but I'm still waiting until next september to move along in this process. It's shocking how expensive this is!! Does anyone know if any of this can be claimed as a tax deduction as a medical expense? That might help a tiny bit.....
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  • AmirasmommyAmirasmommy Senior Member Senior Member
    Yes I think you can claim it as a tax deduction. Do a search on it...I saw something about that a few days ago but I don't remember where...they explained how to do it.
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  • Anne72Anne72 Senior Member Senior Member
    dreamsabc123 wrote:
    Thanks, that was very helpful. I did find an RE, but I'm still waiting until next september to move along in this process. It's shocking how expensive this is!! Does anyone know if any of this can be claimed as a tax deduction as a medical expense? That might help a tiny bit.....

    You can deduct medical expenses if they are more than ~7% (might be 8%) of your income (not sure if that is gross or net income). I'm keeping a spreadsheet of everything that I'm spending, even purchases of pregnancy and ovulation tests, prenatal vitamins, acupuncture, everything. Also keep track of all your other medical expenses that are unrelated to this since you can use those to get up to the ~7% amount.

    It is expensive, but I'm praying every day that I will have a healthy son or daughter at the end of it all!
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  • dreamsabc123dreamsabc123 Senior Member Senior Member
    Thank you!
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  • dreamsabc123dreamsabc123 Senior Member Senior Member
    It sounds like a silly question but does the donor sperm purchased count as a medical expense?
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  • AmirasmommyAmirasmommy Senior Member Senior Member
    Hmmmm...good question....not sure. Maybe check on one of those tax websites. I bet it is.
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  • Anne72Anne72 Senior Member Senior Member
    dreamsabc123 wrote:
    It sounds like a silly question but does the donor sperm purchased count as a medical expense?


    I sure as heck hope so! This is what I'm expecting to take me over the 7% amount
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  • dreamsabc123dreamsabc123 Senior Member Senior Member
    Well I was thinking thats what would eventually help me too lol
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  • manda210manda210 Member Member
    hmmm I never considered sperm being a part of that...did you get a receipt when you bought yours from here?? I dont remember getting one it was just charged to my credit card. Wont we need a receipt for taxes??
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  • smilingeyessmilingeyes Junior Member Junior Member
    I have used the donor sperm, storage etc. for my medical expenses for taxes. The 7% adds up quickly when you do IUI's and IVF. My flex benefits even allowed me to use money for sperm as well! Check into your plan.
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  • manda210manda210 Member Member
    what receipt do you use for the sperm for your taxes? I have it highlighted on my credit card bill but will i need more then that?? I probably wont have 7 percent without the sperm since my insurance covered some of my first 3 IUIs last year. But I will def be over the 7 percent with the sperm costs
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