scared

2lovergirls

Hi I am new at this and would just like some reassurance, anything would help.

I am 30 and the clock is ticking!!!!! The love of my life is 28. we have been together for 6yrs..we have 3 dogs, its time for a baby. we both want to have a baby. we both want to carry. we want our children to be related by using the same donor. i would be first since i am older. i am just confused and worried. career, check. house, check. nest egg, check. doctor, check. prenatal vitamins for months check, been there done that check...... now since it seems like everything is perfect and its "TIME" why is the hardest part selecting a donor?? i am so worried about 500 half siblings and are the profiles legitimate or is it some mad scientist who wants 1 million children, and all the sperm samples belongs to 1 person. (dateline is scary)... am i the only one who is scarred about the process??? my partner thinks "its no big deal"."its safe" "click. order. your done. i am ready lets have a family".... am i over worried? am i crazy? i have been researching for months i can not find any info or statistics about birth defects or severe health problems with couples who choose artificial insemination... is the elimination process that good? and what are the effects of freezing and storage on the child's health out comes? how long can they store before they sell? YES i know this sounds silly but this is all the craziness running through my head and that is why i am looking for help or answers anything....... thank you.....sincerely 2 girls in love who just want to be the best moms ever, one lucky day.

Egarza03

I know how you feel. My partner and I are starting the process but it's taking a little longer. I'm 30 as well and my love is 38. I'm scared too wondering what kind of complications the freeze will have on the "baby dust". I'm having an HSG test this Friday to find out if I can even conceive. I'm nervous but anxious. I could relate to your post because we have been trying to prepare for this next step in our lives as well. We bought our house two years ago, been saving, and got our careers in check. Where are you in the process? I've skimmed through the donors but I'm still waiting for all this testing to be completed so I can get the green light from my doctor.

sweetpea

Well, I can tell you from my experience that all of that went through my mind too in the beginning. Now, as I am staring down IUI # 6, I just want a dang baby. My search on donors now looks like this: what is the reported pregnancy range and can I find anyone on this forum that has had success with a donor. Everytime someone posts on here they are pregnant, I want to know by which donor and what the sperm counts were. It seems that in the three donors I have used, the counts have all sucked! Maybe the person doing my counting is really conservative because I don't know how anyone gets the large #'s they are reporting. My suggestion is to call Fairfax and get the pregnancy range and then start narrowing it down from there.

2lovergirls

We are still in the process of narrowing down donors and to be truthful we didn't even consider the "pregnancy range." Our doctor has given us the all clear and even provided some helpful hints on attempting "home insemination." We're not sure what the success rate % is but we figured it was worth a shot at saving some money. Needless to say, we have a lot of research left to do. There's just not a lot of information out there. Does anyone know the process of buying sperm and saving it for later use for future siblings? Is it expensive? "Sweetpea" does fairfax not have that program that if you purchase sperm and not become pregnant, they give you a vial free? Have they held true to their word? Hope you get pregnant soon! Maybe six is your lucky number!

hopefulchar

2girls,

Fairfax is really good about everything. If a vial doesn't meet their 10 million post wash/post thaw guarantee they will either refund or give you a credit. They leave it up to the client to decide. They also have a pregnancy pledge program that if you have four cycles that don't work done at a dr office your 5th vial is free. you can also join the club (it is 100 to join) and you get free shipping on your first purchase (which is normally at least 150) and then your 6th vial is free. You also get special promotions every few months that are not opened to the public. Last month was 10% off.

Good Luck with everything

sweetpea

I did contact them about he pregnancy pledge and did receive my 5th vial for free. I also had a credit for a vial that was under 10 million, so last month, I received two free vials. But when I went in to have my IUI, they had to use both vials because the count was so low and with both combined, it was only 10.9 million. So, I am currently in the process of getting another refund on one of the vials.

bluesky10

My partner and I used Cryolab the sister site to this one. We used one donor, had excellent sperm cause 3 vials gave us two beautiful healthy girls.

I also had some sperm I stored for 6 months before selling back to them with out issue.

2lovergirls

Bluesky,

I'm so happy to hear that y'all had girls! We want at least on of our offspring to be a girl, but we read a statistic that said 99% of artificial inseminations pregnancies are boys. Can you offer any advise?

SaraBell

So, did you do 2 times per cycle? I'm convinced there is a better shot for a girl if the sperm is already there when the egg is released. I want to have a girl too. I mean, a little boy would be wonderful but girl stuff is so much fun!

bluesky10

No we did not do back to back. I think our donor just had a high girl count as he had two of his own kids, one of each. I also know two other women who used him and both had girls.

The IUI that took for me was done after I ovulated. I felt myself ovulate a few hours before the actual IUI.

manda210

my friend did IUIs with two different donors and she has two girls and Ive seen quite a few other people on here that have had girls....so its hard for me to believe that 99% are boys....i would be happy with either and I am not sure there is anything you can do to try to have one or the other unless you have the lab spin the sperm or do IVF and they figure out if the embryos are boys or girls....good luck everyone tho!!!

Mikko77

2lovergirls wrote:

We are still in the process of narrowing down donors and to be truthful we didn't even consider the "pregnancy range." Our doctor has given us the all clear and even provided some helpful hints on attempting "home insemination." We're not sure what the success rate % is but we figured it was worth a shot at saving some money. Needless to say, we have a lot of research left to do. There's just not a lot of information out there. Does anyone know the process of buying sperm and saving it for later use for future siblings? Is it expensive? "Sweetpea" does fairfax not have that program that if you purchase sperm and not become pregnant, they give you a vial free? Have they held true to their word? Hope you get pregnant soon! Maybe six is your lucky number!

Don't be "scared" ladies.. you can do this.. and don't worry too much about the age.. unless you are about 45 years old your chances are good as anyone else's. My partner and I just started this process shortly before my 34th birthday this summer. You all are getting the test completed so it looks like you are on your way. Trying at home can work.. from what we have researched your chances are about the same with doing this in a doctor's office.. but doing it at home it's usually called a ICI and it's cervical so your mucus plays more of a role.. I think the more sperm and the more chances you have to inseminate the better.. with at home insemination. Couples I know that had success at home used someone they knew and they were able to plan around their ovulation and they inseminated the following day of the ovulation and the 2nd, and 3rd day..

If you do the IUI.. I think the success rate is 5% to 25% .. which is good.. and most cryobanks will work with you on making sure the quality of the sperm is of good quality. It's just one of those things you just don't know.. it may work the first time or the 2nd or 3rd.. maybe it will take a 4th or 5th try.. but I have heard that after the 4th or 5th IUI it would make sense to go to a IVF.. I am wishing everyone THICK, STICKY.. Baby Dust !! Hope all goes well.. Good Luck and Blessings everyone..

Julieharp

I know the process is long and scary. I did not get pregnant until try #5. That was 10 vials and a lot of heartache. I did not get pregnant until I took fertility drugs and was monitored daily. We thought about at home but did not want to mess anything up. Luckily we did not do at home because all the ovulation tests I took were wrong. I was 35 when I got pregnant. I now have a perfect baby boy who is about to turn 2yrs old. When I searched for a donor I picked a donor who had a daughter because I wanted a girl. My theory did not work. But my son is the best thing that ever happened to us. Hang in there and Good luck!

hopefulchar

Julie. If you don't mind me asking how do u know that your opks were off? I have done 8 iuis with only Clomid or naturally and opks. I have always thought my timing was off. I am currently on my first round with injectables and a trigger shot. Plus lots of monitoring. Just was looking for what worked with you.

wonderwoman

Hey scared -

You sound just like my partner, and your post made us laugh. I say - don't worry so much. If and when it is right, it will happen. At some point, you have to remember that your life will be complete with or without a baby. Also, heterosexual couples don't usually fret over sperm count and medical histories - they just have sex and bam out comes a baby. And then you deal with all of the possibilities. If all of us let our anxieties stop us, the human race would end. Chillax and good luck

Posted by wonderwoman's partner (who is going to be the best mommy in the whole wide world!)

Julieharp

Sorry I have not been back on. I hope things have worked out by now. The trigger shot and clomid with daily monitoring worked for me. It appeared that the ovulation kits read wrong for me. I actually ovulated a few days after the kits told me. I did not accept that until we spent a lot of money. My second cycle with trigger shot worked. Good luck

Mrs.Graham

i am only 24 and i am so scared me and my partner had our first child 5 years ago and we want to try the ici again and its just mind bottling that that it just might not work so good this time

2lovergirls

why would it not work out this time? Ms. Graham. you are young and fertile. did you have trouble the first time around?