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To Note:
Private Donor Groups and Private Sibling Connection Groups are now located under the category "Groups". Search the donor number in the search box and you should find exactly what you're looking for!
Questions about your forum access? Email forum@fairfaxcryobank.com
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*If you are looking to start a private group for a PRS donor please email forum@fairfaxcryobank.com with the above information and that you are looking for a PRS group*
If you have any questions about the verification process please email forum@fairfaxcryobank.com
The forum has a new look and the Fairfax Team is so excited to create the best experience for our users.
To Note:
Private Donor Groups and Private Sibling Connection Groups are now located under the category "Groups". Search the donor number in the search box and you should find exactly what you're looking for!
Questions about your forum access? Email forum@fairfaxcryobank.com
Follow these steps to join a private donor group:
1) Press "Join" at the right of the group
2) Once prompted to confirm your request please list this information so we can verify your information:
Name (under which the vial was purchased)
Clinic Name
Donor number
Child Date of Birth
*If you are looking to start a private group for a PRS donor please email forum@fairfaxcryobank.com with the above information and that you are looking for a PRS group*
If you have any questions about the verification process please email forum@fairfaxcryobank.com
Maternal Fetal Medicine
dreamsabc123
Senior Member Senior Member
Hi everyone,
Sorry I have been abscent for a little while. I hope everyone is doing well and having lots of sticky baby dust
Yesterday I met with my RE for the first time and had my initial consultation visit. I was looking forward to this visit and having more of my questyions answered, but instead I barely asked any of my original questions and left feeling more nsure and with even more questions!! I even went in to the appointment prepared with a list of questions! I have a fairly serious heart condition where I will need to have my valve replaced in a few years and my cardiologist felt that I should be having my kids soon before we have to replace the valve and having kids will be WAAAAY more complicared if not impossible. My RE looked over my medical reports and is very concerned about what my health will be like if I become pregnant. Sghe scheduled me for another appointment with a Maternal Fetal Medicine specialist to talk about all the risks there will be if I do go through with this. She said I would be a VERY high risk pregnancy and maybe should think about using my eggs and donor sperm and having someone else carry my baby or consider adoption or foster care. I told her there would be no way I could afford to pay someone else to carry my child and that I really want to have my own. I also mentioned again to her that my cardiologist felt that now would be a good time to do this. My RE said that was good to hear and that would be the specialist they would want to hear that from, but she is still ver concerned about how a pregnancy would be for me and if my heart could handle it. Has anyone ever experienced anything like this? I'm a little nervous and scared now. My appointment with the Maternal Fetal Medicine doctor isnt until July 2. I'm really worried what she might say my risks will be. Am I being selfish by wanting to have children of my own? I really need to hear some peoples thoughts on this issue. Thanks!
Lori
Sorry I have been abscent for a little while. I hope everyone is doing well and having lots of sticky baby dust
Yesterday I met with my RE for the first time and had my initial consultation visit. I was looking forward to this visit and having more of my questyions answered, but instead I barely asked any of my original questions and left feeling more nsure and with even more questions!! I even went in to the appointment prepared with a list of questions! I have a fairly serious heart condition where I will need to have my valve replaced in a few years and my cardiologist felt that I should be having my kids soon before we have to replace the valve and having kids will be WAAAAY more complicared if not impossible. My RE looked over my medical reports and is very concerned about what my health will be like if I become pregnant. Sghe scheduled me for another appointment with a Maternal Fetal Medicine specialist to talk about all the risks there will be if I do go through with this. She said I would be a VERY high risk pregnancy and maybe should think about using my eggs and donor sperm and having someone else carry my baby or consider adoption or foster care. I told her there would be no way I could afford to pay someone else to carry my child and that I really want to have my own. I also mentioned again to her that my cardiologist felt that now would be a good time to do this. My RE said that was good to hear and that would be the specialist they would want to hear that from, but she is still ver concerned about how a pregnancy would be for me and if my heart could handle it. Has anyone ever experienced anything like this? I'm a little nervous and scared now. My appointment with the Maternal Fetal Medicine doctor isnt until July 2. I'm really worried what she might say my risks will be. Am I being selfish by wanting to have children of my own? I really need to hear some peoples thoughts on this issue. Thanks!Lori
Comments
My thoughts go out to you because this is one of those life changing decisions that only you can make. It's important to get a second opinion, essentially a fresh look at your unique situation. I would suggest a university based teaching hospital with a specialty practice. Depending on where you live they may require some travel. I live in MD and have about 6 major hospitals within a 20 minute drive. There are patients that fly internationally to come to one particular hospital in the area where I happen to work. Anyway, this isn't an easy decision and I wish I could offer you words of advice. I just would recommend that you continue to be diligent and research everything so that you can be informed and empowered about your situation.
Please feel free to contact me if you need to chat/vent. Wishing you all the best.
Moe
Do research like moe said and go and talk to the maternal fetal doctor. They would be a specialist. Just like the re is a specialist in getting you pregnant the maternal doc would be a specialist regarding all the other medical conditions. Find someone that is willing to work very closely with your cardiologist. Maybe have your cardiologist write a letter for you to take with you explaining his reasoning for telling you to have your family now.....maybe he can also write why he is not as concerned as they are. Don't lose hope yet......get all the facts. I know how disappointing it must have been to hear that you have another stop to make before starting this journey. It may also mean finding an re that will be supportive. I don't know if that will be the re you spoke with or if you will need to find another.
Good luck to you!
Robin
My cardiologist is extremly smart and one of the best in this country and she is at a teaching hospital. The RE did say they would need my cardiologist working with them, but my cardiologist is from a different hospital then where my RE is at. They suggested I find an RE in the hospital that my cardiologist works from. The problem with that is my health insurance covers the RE's in this hospital and not the other one. So I have to go where my insurance will pay for at least some of this. They agreed and suggested that I get a second cardiologist from their hospital to help with this process. I'm scared to do that because as a child I had a cardiologist from this hospital and he was a great person, but an awful person and almost let me died from not being treated properly. This is a wonderful hospital, but the heart condition I have less then 2% of the population has so he just wasnt capable of treating someone like me with the proper testing I needed. Anyway, I switched from their cardiologist to the group I go to now and I'm afraid to have anything to do with these other cardilogists. I'm hoping my cardiologist now wont mind connecting with these doctors to help me even though they are from different hospitals and areas. It will be hard not having her in the same place as they are though. I think if I go ahead and do this that maybe after I'm a month or two pregnant I would try to switch to the dioctors out where my current cardilogist is. I know where my cardiologist is in her hospital they have an award winning high risk pregnancy group and I would want to deliver at this hospital, not where my RE is. I'm just really scared what the maternal fetal medicine doctor will say about my risks of being pregnant. I looked it up online and it didn't sound good. I did change my appointment to June 18th so the appointment is closer then what they first scheduled me or which was July. I just really wish I had some answers now. I'm a little scared that if I do go ahead with this pregnancy that its going to be a hell of a pregnancy too. I'll just have to keep my fingers, toes, hairs and whatever else I can cross, crossed! I appreciate all of your advice.
Lori
I can't imagine having to switch cardiologists especially when you trust the one you are with. Hopefully your doc will consult with them and they will consult back. I think it is crazy how some docs in different hopsitals cant talk to each other. I am glad that you were able to move up your appointment so you can get answers and make an informed decision. I am sure that the waiting is driving you nuts! know that I am here if you need to vent, you can always send me a PM.
Robin
Since you've got some time focus on you and what you can do to make you feel better. On the day of your appointment wear your favorite outfit and put on a big smile and you'll do fine!
Oh and insurance can be downright bullies but as an insurance warrior myself from fighting them, don't give up the fight because they're not always right.
Best of luck to you and keep your head up!