Hello and welcome to the Fairfax Cryobank Family Forum!
The forum has a new look and the Fairfax Team is so excited to create the best experience for our users.
To Note:
Private Donor Groups and Private Sibling Connection Groups are now located under the category "Groups". Search the donor number in the search box and you should find exactly what you're looking for!
Questions about your forum access? Email forum@fairfaxcryobank.com
Follow these steps to join a private donor group:
1) Press "Join" at the right of the group
2) Once prompted to confirm your request please list this information so we can verify your information:
Name (under which the vial was purchased)
Email
Clinic Name
Donor number
Child Date of Birth
*If you are looking to start a private group for a PRS donor please email forum@fairfaxcryobank.com with the above information and that you are looking for a PRS group*
If you have any questions about the verification process please email forum@fairfaxcryobank.com
The forum has a new look and the Fairfax Team is so excited to create the best experience for our users.
To Note:
Private Donor Groups and Private Sibling Connection Groups are now located under the category "Groups". Search the donor number in the search box and you should find exactly what you're looking for!
Questions about your forum access? Email forum@fairfaxcryobank.com
Follow these steps to join a private donor group:
1) Press "Join" at the right of the group
2) Once prompted to confirm your request please list this information so we can verify your information:
Name (under which the vial was purchased)
Clinic Name
Donor number
Child Date of Birth
*If you are looking to start a private group for a PRS donor please email forum@fairfaxcryobank.com with the above information and that you are looking for a PRS group*
If you have any questions about the verification process please email forum@fairfaxcryobank.com
Venting and Need Advice/Inspiration
ktln77
Member Member
Hi, Everyone.
Looking for a donor is one of the most frustrating, sad, lonely, grief stricken, and stressful experience I have ever had. It doesn't help when every donor I like that matches my husband (I tried to find donors that don't match him) seems to be all on a waitlist and they can give you no clue - not even a rough estimate as to when the donor may become available. All Fairfax would have to do is say something like "donor may become available in Winter 2012 pending results of tests and pregnancy reports." It would be the fair and nicer thing to do rather than keep someone waiting who may want to start a cycle in the next month. At least you would know to move on and keep looking - something I am doing anyways but very disappointed about. This process is stressful enough and it truly can hurt relationships to the point of no return (not something I like to admit because I love my husband dearly and it deeply saddens me to think this way, but I am so stressed and I have no more joy in my life because I feel like I can keep searching and never find my donor). I would think that Fairfax would be a little more sensitive to these issues. Anyways, I want to know, when all hope seems lost and all your best efforts seem to get thwarted, how do you keep yourself going? I am in need of some inspiration. Thank you for listening.
Looking for a donor is one of the most frustrating, sad, lonely, grief stricken, and stressful experience I have ever had. It doesn't help when every donor I like that matches my husband (I tried to find donors that don't match him) seems to be all on a waitlist and they can give you no clue - not even a rough estimate as to when the donor may become available. All Fairfax would have to do is say something like "donor may become available in Winter 2012 pending results of tests and pregnancy reports." It would be the fair and nicer thing to do rather than keep someone waiting who may want to start a cycle in the next month. At least you would know to move on and keep looking - something I am doing anyways but very disappointed about. This process is stressful enough and it truly can hurt relationships to the point of no return (not something I like to admit because I love my husband dearly and it deeply saddens me to think this way, but I am so stressed and I have no more joy in my life because I feel like I can keep searching and never find my donor). I would think that Fairfax would be a little more sensitive to these issues. Anyways, I want to know, when all hope seems lost and all your best efforts seem to get thwarted, how do you keep yourself going? I am in need of some inspiration. Thank you for listening.
Comments
Do what you can now to prepare yourself. Such as maybe excercising or going to massage or doing acupucture. Some of these things can help to prepare you for the iuis and get yourself in the best possible situation. I know you have probably been trying for a while and want to start the next phase try to focus on what you have nd what you can do instead of what you cant control. You cant control what fairfax will say to you but you can control how you react and what you do. This process is a roller coaster from beginning till the end. Have faith that this will workfor you, you will find the donor you are meant to. Have you ever thought maybe you havent found one bc the donor you are meant to use is going to be released next month? I know it sounds crazy but it is possible right?!
Take a deep breath and tell yourself this will happen! If it gets too stressful talk to someone like a counselor. I had to talk to one before even starting the process as a requirement by my re and it was a great experience. She was able to help a lot.
Baby dust and I guess donor dust to you!
Robin
Just not sure if you're aware, but there are dozens of other cryobanks. I used various donors from Fairfax over the course of about 1.5 years and was disappointed that they didn't have a variety mixed race donors. I did research and used another cryobank that offered the same services at a slightly lower cost AND they had available donors that fit my needs. This is when I had a successful cycle and I'm currently 22 weeks pregnant now.
Sometimes just the stress of finding the right donor can negatively impact your outcome. Relax and try to move forward with a positive outlook. Be informed and realize that there are choices.
Good luck on your journey.
Baby dust
I have my days and yesterday was a bad one. I am so grateful for all the advice and inspiration. Your advice and stories really helped me to put things into perspective again. Robin, thank you for sharing your story; that really must have been a stressful time for you. Anyways, I just wanted to say thank you and that I have tried your suggestions to include putting out positive thoughts to the universe and envisioning my future family and things seem to be opening up because I found a few more donors. I hate when I feel stuck/fixated because I have a time limit and nothing seems to be moving forward. I need ICI vials because I am doing IVF (a procedure that I find can be stressful and scary by itself) and sometimes those vials can be harder to come by. You all have good hearts to reach out to a total stranger and I will keep you in my prayers. Baby dust to all!
When I was looking for my husband donor match I was lucky the fairfax had a special where all photo were free. So I just got photos or all the donor on my list. N I glad I did cause most would have never came close to having any facial traits as my husband. But one did he its like a perfect match all around.
I think I good n bad days come with every new n first step.
Unfurnitly I don't have any good news to share I'm still new n struggling myself.
When I read what u were feeling it was good to hear cause it made me feel little better that my thought aren't alone. (Thoughts n feeling with husband )
Good luck keep us posted.
Always here to listen. Venting welcome lol
Cause you aren't alone.
Kate